“We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can’t cope with is therefore your own problem.”

So I’m up earlier than I was hoping this morning.

Caleb woke up for a change and a feed at 6 am. So I changed him. And I fed him. And then he did a poo. So I changed him again. Then I went back to feeding him. Then I burped him. Then I thought he was asleep, so I turned the light off. But of course he wasn’t, so I got up again, and he’d wet his nappy AGAIN, so I got up, got yet another clean nappy, got ready to change him, and of course he picks right then to piddle all over my side of the bed, including my pillow.

So I finished changing him, put a clean shirt on him, turned my quilt around so the wet bit is at the foot of the bed, turn my pillow around, and put a dry sheet down over the wet bits, and try to go back to sleep again. That only sounds gross if you’re not a parent yet – if you have a four week old baby, you can’t be bothered grabbing clean stuff all the time because it’s just gonna get piddled/pooped/barfed on anyway, so what’s the point?

And so once again, I try to finish feeding him. And once again, he wets his nappy. And he’s making “I need to poo” noises. And by this time it’s 7 am, and other than the ones in the nappy bag, we’re down to three clean nappies (because the rest are hanging on the line outside) and Darrin’s getting up for work pretty soon. And so I gave up, and here I am.

One of these days I’ll remember what sleep is….

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