Bugs

Parody of “Smug” by Steve Taylor (parody by Weird Alex)

Find them in your clothes

Maybe in your hair

Crawling in your nightie

Tromping down the stairs

Almost anywhere

(Ooh, just like mice!)

Practice in a mirror

Hunting them like deer

Very sincere

A promising career could begin right here at home

If you like them bugs, them bugs…

Hey mama, hey mama look at what your little babies all gone and done

Hey mama, hey mama don’t you ever wish you’d gone and been a nun?

Not vain, not fickle, maybe weaned on a pickle

Must be in our blood

Rome’s flambeeing, we’re okaying bugs

Find some more of those

Little gnats and ticks

Smother them with ketchup

Get your buggy fix

We love the nightcrawlers

We love the bugs underneath the hedge

Find some more bugs

Eat them like a man

One part little spiders

Two part drosophilan

Or is that more than you can stand?

My, my, don’t you like bugs?

Scary, scary, scary, scary

Hey mama, hey mama look at what your little babies all gone and done

Hey mama, hey mama don’t you ever wish you’d gone and been a nun?

Not vain, not fickle, maybe weaned on a pickle

Must be in our blood

Rome’s flambeeing, we’re okaying bugs

All you bug-starved millions just a looking for more

Welcome to our store!

What you wanna munch?

We can help you eat lunch from little sugar ants to great big bugs

Bugs from the homes of our country club brethren

Scraped fresh from a tomb

Or maybe from the bottom of a locker room broom

Now what’s the matter? Hey?

Looking for cheese? That part don’t come till later!

The chef will not be pleased…

Hey mama, hey mama look at what your little babies all gone and done

Hey mama, hey mama don’t you ever wish you’d gone and been a nun?

Not vain, not fickle, maybe weaned on a pickle

Must be in our blood

Rome’s flambeeing, we’re okaying

Rome is frying, we’re all trying

Rome is heating, now we’re eating

Bugs.

(Voiceover on fadeout:)

“I wanna talk to you about bugs, people. You think they’re so good? No, they ain’t good, and I wanna tell you why. You wanna eat a good bug, you come to me. You lookin for some insects? Cuz I got ’em. You lookin for some arachnids? Cuz I got ’em. They’re good, they’re crunchy, they’re better than yours! You look at me and you say, brother, how can I find such bugs. Well, I’ll tell ya. It took me a long time! I’ve arrived! I’m alive! I’ve got the best bugs!…”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *