Author Archives: melvan

Well, that was awkward.

So the house is officially on the market, it’s online, and we have a sign out front and everything.

House for sale sign

Micah doing his usual thing trying to read every word he sees…everywhere.

Thursday around lunchtime, when I was (what else?) cooking lunch, I had a brother and sister come to the door to ask about buying the house before the first open next Tuesday. I said they should probably go through the agent, and the sister (the extrovert of the two) said they’d tried ringing him, but he was busy. So they came directly to the owner because they thought that might give them a better foot in the door.

Now, if you know anything about me at all, you know that I’m an introvert – I don’t like being surprised by people on my doorstep unless they’re delivering a package to me. And I’m not a big fan of things being sprung on my all of a sudden.

So here’s the deal: they offered $10k over what’s being advertised on the listing. So it’s a good offer. But their story didn’t add up.

See, one minute they said they wanted to live here, and the next they said ‘you can stay as long as you like till you find another house.’

And they didn’t want to see the inside of the house – they didn’t care about that, they just wanted to buy before the open. But if they wanted to live here, why wouldn’t they want to see the inside?

They also dropped this gem: that if I told the agent we were friends (!) I could pay less commission when the house sold. I’m not even sure if that’s true.

To shut them up, I told them I’d have to check with my husband and think it over. They asked for my mobile number (which in retrospect I wish I hadn’t given) and I went back to making lunch, and they walked away.

I emailed the agent to let him know they showed up, and he wasn’t happy about it. He’d been in meetings all morning so hadn’t got their message earlier. One thing he said was that people new to the country don’t always understand the etiquette (which I can thoroughly understand!) so that might be why they thought it was ok to come talk to me instead of going through him. So for the moment, I assumed that was the case and went on with my life.

Then that evening, the sister texted me a long explanation reiterating what they’d said when they came to see me. That they wanted to buy it before the open, and they don’t care how it looks inside, and we can stay as long as we need, and it’s a good offer. And she said if I didn’t accept their offer within 48 hours, they’d withdraw it because ‘Hope you know there are so many other properties that can give me hips [sic] better rental income which I don’t want to miss on while waiting for your response to my offer.’

Okay…so first they said they want to live here, then they said we can stay as long as we like, and now she’s saying they want the rental income? Huh? All sounds a bit suspicious to me.

Friday morning at about 9:30, I got a text saying that if I didn’t accept the offer in 1 hour, they’d withdraw it.

Okay, so Thursday night you said 48 hours, and Friday morning you said 1 hour. You want to live here, but you want the rental income. You want me to lie to the agent, tell them we’re friends, and accept your offer which you brought to me unannounced, uninvited AT MY HOUSE while I was cooking lunch for my kids, and getting ready to go to a friend’s house.

All of this left me feeling harassed and slightly threatened. So I replied back that they should withdraw their offer and stop contacting me.

We’ll see if that’s the end of it…

Our house is on the market.

Link here

So long story short…the friend we thought we were selling to, we aren’t anymore. I won’t go into the details here, but don’t worry, we’re all still friends.

Been packing, decluttering, cleaning, searching properties, going to open inspections…it’s busy around here right now.

And I have one decent sized box left that I can pack things in, and then I’ll have to go hunting for boxes.

Good news and bad news…

So I’m going to write the update and then write the title, because I don’t know what to title this.

In our last episode, we saw Mel and Darrin waiting for the second quote on replacing the gas line, and wondering what to do next…

The plumber was meant to come on Monday afternoon, but it got to 5 pm and I texted him to find out if he was still coming. He said ‘oops, I put you in my book for Tuesday by accident, sorry.’ So he came on Tuesday instead. His quote ended up being about $1000 less than the first plumber, but that’s still a lot of money when we’re definitely NOT staying here long enough to get that much use out of it.

So…we are not replacing the gas line. We’re putting up with things as is until we find a new house. We’ll hire the temporary hot water system until we can move. We have a workable situation that we’ll just live with for a few weeks.

Wednesday morning I went to the bank meeting and got good news! Because of Darrin only being employed for 3 months at a casual job, the home loan officer said our easiest option would be to make our current home loan ‘portable’ – which means they can just move our current home loan to a new property, provided a) the purchase price of a new place is less than the sale of this place, and b) settlement (closing) happens on the same day for both properties.

Since we already pretty much know who we’re selling to, that should be pretty easy.

So we have a number in mind, which means now we can look at houses! And by ‘we’ I obviously mean ‘I’ because Darrin hates this kind of thing, and his standards are way lower than mine, so he says ‘if it works for you it’ll probably work for me.’

I’ve already been to one open inspection, we did make an offer, but the owners had already accepted an offer. I’m not surprised or disappointed. I kinda feel like we should offer on everything we see just in case we get one, because almost anything would be better than this house. I won’t offer on a property I absolutely hate, but I don’t have to LOVE the house in order to live there. It just has to be better.

Any house we buy will definitely need some work. That’s the reality of what we can afford right now combined with what the market is like. There had to have been 50 people at the inspection I went to the other day. I’ve never seen that many people at an inspection, even though it was 15 years ago I last looked at houses.

So here we go. Wish us luck, pray that the right house comes up at the right time.

Out of gas

Better go get yourself a cuppa, this is gonna be a long one…

So. In July, I found a secondhand gas oven on Gumtree (Australia’s Craig’s list) for $150. Because ours was falling apart, and half the nozzles in the oven were covered up by melted plastic (thanks to a toddler who put something in there one day and we didn’t notice till it started stinking). We hired a gasfitter to come and install it. I kept the oven racks from the old oven, so we could cook 4 pizzas at once, and it was good. It even had automatic ignition (on 3 of the burners) and a fan. It was working pretty well.

Then we started noticing a smell. Not all the time, just every now and then, we’d notice a waft of gas smell. (Or, to be pedantic, the stuff they put in the gas to make it smell so you know it’s leaking.) Since it wasn’t always there, we couldn’t tell if it was us, or if it was blowing in from a neighbour. But Darrin did some poking around one day and found a leak in the pipe coming up out of the ground which goes into the house where the oven is. He found the leak.

So last Friday, we had a gas guy come out again to fix the leak. In the process of all that, he did some testing on the gas line, and said we’ll need a whole new gas line from the meter. He said couldn’t leave the gas on when he left for his next job, but that he’d send someone else out with a temporary hot water system that we could hook up and at least have hot water over the weekend.

He left, and almost immediately the next guy turned up with the temporary water heater. He got it into the bathroom and realised he didn’t have the right fittings to hook it up, and it was 5 pm by this time and the plumbing store was closing. So he had to go and send someone back in the morning to connect it.

Did I mention this all happened on a day when I was getting ready to go to Victor Harbor for the weekend with some friends? Yeah. So Darrin got home around 4, and the first guy was still here. I’d been planning to wait till Darrin got back from work before I left, but then all this happened, and I didn’t feel right leaving before all the water heater stuff was sorted. So then the second guy left, and a few minutes later, so did I.

I had a great weekend, by the way. By the end I was ready to get home, so it was about the right length of time to be away. First time I’ve been away without kids in 5 years. Second time I’ve been away without kids since I had kids! Must do it more often.

So now we’re trying to work out what to do about it. As I’ve mentioned previously, this house is a pile of crap. Okay, not literally, but it’s falling apart everywhere. It’s 60 years old. It’s one of those houses they put up quickly and cheaply in the 1960s when Adelaide’s population boomed. Houses like this have been getting knocked down all over the place for at least 20 years. When we bought this place 15 years ago, the family was expecting the same thing to happen, but were glad we were going to live here. And we had thought about knocking it down ourselves and building a new house, but it’s a lot of hassle and money that we really don’t have right now. And I’m not willing to go into massive amounts of debt with a house payment that’s more than 25-30% of our income.

All week since I got back, I’ve been emailing & texting real estate agents & plumbers, trying to work out the best thing to do for the least reasonable amount of money. We had another plumber recommended to us, but he can’t come see the place till Monday afternoon.

We’ve been thinking, what if we get an electric water heater and put in an extra circuit to handle that? So we had the original plumbing company come out to do a quote. I haven’t heard back from them about that yet, but the quote they gave us to redo the gas line was $6000.

Oh, and what they didn’t tell us, but the other plumber did, is that the rules state that if you have gas on a property, you HAVE TO have gas hot water. Or solar (which is backed up by gas anyway), or heat pump (which is more expensive). So that leaves us having to replace the gas line after all, and trying to find the cheapest person to do it.

Because we don’t want to be here forever. Personally, I was DONE with this house 5 years ago when I found out Micah was on his way. But we’ve stayed, because, firstly, we weren’t organised with money to move, so we worked at building up our savings, and then covid happened, and we didn’t want to move when things were uncertain, and then Darrin quit his job and it took 9 months to find a new one, and then we had another lockdown so he was off work for 3 weeks, and we’re still waiting for him to get a decent number of hours consistently.

But now, it seems we don’t have a choice. We have to do something. Selling the house would put us in a good position to do whatever we wanted. But it’s a pain in the neck packing and cleaning and house hunting and paperwork…but we don’t have a choice. Even if we get a new gas line put in, how long before something else breaks that’s even more expensive? It’s time to get out. And we have a friend who wants to buy the property to put a new house on it for himself. So that part would be easy and quick.

But it sucks that we’re being forced to do it before we’re ready. And do we rent or buy? Renting means we don’t have to fix anything, but the houses I’ve looked at that would suit us, even with rent assistance (through Centrelink, the place where you get government payments…eventually, if you fight hard enough and sign in blood in triplicate), our rent would be more than our mortgage payment + council rates (property tax) + property insurance + water bill. We’d have a huge chunk of money in the bank, so we could wear the extra cost for a while, but I wouldn’t want to do it for very long.

Renting means landlords who allow pets are few and far between. And probably cost more. And we have two cats. But it also means we’d have some time to find the RIGHT house to buy.

Buying means we have a new-to-us house that’s OURS (and the bank’s, of course) and we can do whatever we want there. If we can find something suitable.

So yeah, I don’t know what we’re going to do yet. But stay tuned for updates.

20 years ago today

Tuesday, September 11, 2001. I woke up at 8 am from the best sleep I’d had since switching from the night shift a few days before, to a beautiful blue sky. I had a good feeling about the day.

I got on my computer and checked my email and the Bannerbored, a message board for fans of Steve Taylor who also used our IRC channel called #bannerman. I saw a post from my friend Alex in Canada saying to pray for New York, because a plane had hit one of the towers of the World Trade Center.

Yeah, right, I thought. I thought it was one of those internet hoaxes that were so common in those days. I mean, how many times have we seen that kind of thing in movies? Total hoax. And I couldn’t believe my intelligent friend had fallen for it.

But everywhere I looked online, I saw the same thing. And I don’t remember exactly what happened after that, but at some point I realised that maybe this wasn’t a joke and turned on the TV. And I think I saw the second plane hit, or I tuned in just after, and the good feeling I had about the day was replaced with impending dread.

This was when I knew it wasn’t an accident. It was deliberate. And the country wouldn’t lie down and take it.

We were united. We weren’t Republicans or Democrats. We were Americans.

I’ve been gone now for almost 18 years, and from what I see from over here, the country is more divided than ever. I’ve certainly never seen it this divided in my lifetime. The 60s we’re pretty turbulent I know, but I wouldn’t know if that was worse. It’s hard not to worry whether I’ll even have a country to go back to when I finally get the chance. I just have to keep reminding myself that God is in control, and ask him to remind me when I forget.

Priorities.

This exchange just happened in our house.

Micah asked to play a game on the computer, to which we said no, because our rule is that kids don’t play on computers until after lunch.

He asked again, and I said “Kids don’t get to play on computers in our house till after lunch, or in very extreme circumstances like if Mum and Dad are sick, and can’t be bothered, and let you do whatever.”

Darrin said, “Careful, don’t say that or Caleb will start poisoning our food!”

Caleb: “No I won’t, because I might get the dosage wrong and kill you, and then who would fix the computers?”

Yep. Definitely our kid.

The grocery bill with 4 boys

It sounds scary, and sometimes it is. And we don’t have coupons in Australia like they have in the States. But I have a few tricks I use to feed everyone without going over budget (most of the time).

First, I set a weekly budget based on what Jordan Page recommends. Her rule is to budget $100 per person per month, starting at $300, and then break it down by week. So a family of 1-3 people would still get $300 to spend each month, and about $75 each week.

Now Jordan Page lives in Utah, and there’s quite a difference between the cost of living there and here, not to mention our currency isn’t worth as much. So I plugged $600 into x-rates.com and use that as my monthly grocery budget. When I first did it, it came to $900 a month. Which was about $300 less than I was used to spending, but I thought I’d give it a go. Ever since starting to listen to Dave Ramsey, I’m always on the lookout for more ways to cut spending and save money. 900/4=225. So $225 is what I give myself to work with every week.

Here’s another tip I learned from Jordan. She says before you go shopping, make a meal plan from the food you already have in your kitchen, and write the shopping list based on what you’re missing in the meals you’ve planned. This has been a game changer.

Example: I find ground beef and cheese, and half a tub of sour cream. This screams tacos to me, but I don’t have taco shells or tortillas. So I put those on my list, along with any other taco fixings we like.

Another example: there’s most of a roast chicken in the fridge that needs to get used up. I dig around in the freezer and find a bag of broccoli. There’s a yummy chicken and broccoli casserole that I make, so that goes on the meal plan. But I can’t find any bacon to garnish on top, so bacon goes on the list.

See how that works? It’s made a huge difference to the grocery budget, and in turn, our overall budget.

Another thing I do is look for marked down meat. If I have space left in the budget after I’ve got everything on my list, I’ll stock up on sale meat or marked down meat, and keep it in the freezer for later. We bought a chest freezer when Caleb was born, so we have a ton of space for that kind of thing.

And I shop at Aldi as much as possible. Their prices are usually about 10-20% lower than Coles and Woolworths. When I do shop at the big supermarkets, I scan my loyalty card to earn points and money off my shopping. I try not to get sucked into the bonus offers, unless it’s for something I need anyway.

I also use an app called Receipt Jar, which lets you scan your receipts and get points. When you get enough points, you can redeem them for gift cards or a bank deposit. I’ve already redeemed $30 this way (the first time I used $15 to put toward a new car battery when we needed one, and the next time I got Coles gift cards).

I’d like to say I only go shopping once a week, but I often go a few times for emergency chocolate runs. Which is totally a thing, by the way. Don’t judge me.

How we got out of debt and stopped living paycheck to paycheck

I’ve been thinking about writing this one for a long time. And I just listened to a Dave Ramsey video where he was talking about advice, and whether people are going to listen to you based on how you give that advice, and he said that hardly anyone is bothered by you just telling your story. So here we go: the story about how we stopped being ‘normal’ and paid off our debt, and built up our emergency fund.

Once upon a time, we spent all the money that came in to us. Whether it was Darrin’s pay, or the family tax benefit, or the tax at the end of the year, gifts, whatever – we spent it as soon as we had it, and it was gone. I could go shopping on payday or the day after payday, and spend everything without thinking, get home, put it all into my finance app on my computer, and go, ‘oh crap, how am I going to buy petrol this week?’

So what would I do? I’d shuffle bills around, so that the transfers I’d set up wouldn’t go through. I learned a long time ago that it’s better for me to make fortnightly installments on quarterly bills like gas, electricity, and water, so missing one of those payments wouldn’t be a big deal – I’d just make up for it when the bill came in.

If I couldn’t shuffle the bills around, I’d login to Centrelink and get an advance on my family tax benefit. Or if an advance wasn’t available, I’d transfer some money from my business account (back when I had it) and use that for the petrol or whatever I’d forgotten to account for when I spent all that money on too many groceries.

Elijah was born in November 2018, and so we got an increased Centrelink payment for about 13 weeks. And we needed a new fridge, as ours was on its last legs, so I started saving up some of that money to buy a new fridge. Boxing day 2018 (that’s the day after Christmas for you Americans who don’t observe it), it was stinking hot, and I knew the crowds would be insane, so I ordered our new fridge online. With saved money. I thought I was the coolest because I’d prepared for this. Our new fridge was AWESOME.

The very next day after it was delivered – I kid you not – our washing machine stopped mid-cycle. It was a front loader, so if I opened the door, water everywhere. I eventually worked out how to drain it so that it didn’t flood the laundry room, but I still had that half-washed load of nappies to deal with.

I started looking at washing machines online. A brand new one of the size we needed was around $1000. I desperately searched for an appliance store that would accept Afterpay. I had zero luck. So my next port of call was Radio Rentals. I don’t think they exist anymore (or if they do, in a different capacity), but they would let you ‘rent’ a product and pay it off over time. Their prices weren’t great, but we didn’t have another option – or so we thought.

Radio Rentals turned us down for a rental. So we said rude things about them and I started thinking, ok, NOW what can we do? We had learned years ago that credit cards were a bad idea for us, so we didn’t even have those anymore. We didn’t have any savings. We had a new baby and needed nappies, but I didn’t want to spend $27 a week on a box of nappies for him. And a toddler as well, who was still in nappies, at a pricetag of about $27 every two weeks. I needed to use my cloth nappy stash. But if it was going to cost me as much at the laundromat as it would for disposables, where did that leave us? We NEEDED a new washing machine.

So at some point, I looked at Gumtree. Prior to Facebook Marketplace, this was THE place to go if you wanted to buy or sell anything secondhand in Australia. I found the size washing machine we needed. It was in Craigmore, which is only about 20 minutes away (maybe 15 in good traffic). And it was a price we could afford. And he would deliver. So I arranged all that, and we still have that washing machine to this day.

March 2019. My car’s brakes were grinding BADLY so I booked it for a service. As expected, it needed a lot more than just a service and brakes. I was getting anxiety over not being able to sign up myself for the credit that the mechanic offered. So Darrin had to sign up for it with his income details. My mom arrived for a visit about a week later, and we didn’t have any money to do anything for the first few days. (And then we all got sick anyway, so the only thing we did during her visit was go to the last ever Brickalaide/Kidz Gigantic Day Out, which was actually pretty pathetic compared to the year before. But that’s another story.)

Somewhere in all this, I signed up for Audible. Because when you’re in debt and living paycheck to paycheck, of course you need to pay $16 a month for an audiobook! I had a list of books I wanted to listen to, because it was easier to listen to an audiobook than sit down and actually read one with four kids in the house. Dave Ramsey’s The Total Money Makeover was on my list since the beginning. It was just on there as ‘oh yeah, I should read that one sometime.’

July 2019. I’d done our tax, and we were expecting a refund, as usual. One night I was looking through my Audible list, because I had another credit to use, and saw Dave’s book there, and decided to get that one. So I started listening. And everything he said made sense. I didn’t want to live like this anymore. I wanted to be FREE from money stress.

Darrin & I sat down one night after the kids went to bed, and we came up with our new plan (or rather, I showed him the spreadsheet of the plan I’d made and he said ‘yeah, whatever you think is best’). And so we went to work.

(Yes, writing it that way sounds like Darrin doesn’t care about the financial situation, but that’s not true. He’s just not interested in managing the budget and where all the money goes. But he’s happy to discuss something when it’s relevant and come up with a solution we can live with. He’s good at coming up with alternate solutions that I may not have thought of.)

We were planning to sell our house and move to a bigger one after our tax came in and we paid off a few things. Sadly, but actually not sadly, because of this, I realised that if we tried to move house at that point, we would have been shooting ourselves in the foot. Because when you buy a new house, and the water heater dies the next week, and you don’t have any money because you just spent all your money on buying the new house, moving expenses, lots of takeaway while you get the kitchen in order – you can’t afford a new water heater! So painfully, we decided to wait. And I’m glad we did, even though this house SUCKS BEYOND BELIEF! (actually no – the other day when the rain was bucketing down, I realised that although this house sucks in a lot of ways, we’ve never had a problem with the roof leaking. So praise God for that!)

So…I cancelled my Audible subscription. And Prime. I started using cash in envelopes – yes, actual envelopes! – and when the money in an envelope was gone, that was it till the next pay. And that actually wasn’t as hard to handle as I thought it would be – because it was only ever 14 days till the next time I put money in the envelope.

I started delivering catalogues – you know, the store ads you get delivered to your house. The money wasn’t great, but it was money. And I could take the baby with me if Darrin wasn’t up yet in the morning. I’d listen to the Dave Ramsey Show while I walked. Still miss that part of it – I don’t miss the putting catalogues together every week and having them take over my house, but I did enjoy the walking.

I sold some stuff around the house that we didn’t need anymore. I realised at some point that those FTB advances were actually debt, so I added those to the debt snowball. I printed out a debt payoff chart from Debt Free Charts (all their debt payoff charts are free to download – if you have other goals such as savings, decluttering, even Bible reading, those cost).

We all enjoyed looking at the Debtris chart on the fridge. And whenever I’d colour in some blocks, I’d play the Tetris theme song on YouTube. We heard it so much, the kids were singing it to calm Elijah when he was crying in the car. I kid you not. ‘Bub bubbub bub bubbub bub bubbub bub bubbub bub bubbubbub bub bub bub.’ And it worked.

Before long, the only debt we had left was a loan from a friend who helped us buy flights to get overseas for my dad’s funeral in 2015. And one day when I was talking to the friend about it, they said not to worry about it anymore. So we were officially debt free.

So what did we actually DO? We followed Dave’s advice. We followed the Baby Steps. We built up $1000 in an emergency fund first, and didn’t touch it except for ACTUAL emergencies (like getting the kitchen light fixed after it tried to burn down the house one Sunday morning).

After we had our $1000 starter emergency fund, we threw ALL extra money at the debt. The smallest one first, then the next smallest, and the next, and so on until everything was gone.

The budget was key. Making a plan for our money BEFORE we spent it made a huge difference. I’d already been keeping pretty good records, but that’s only half of the equation. So when I was working out our budget for different categories, I looked at how much we had actually spent in the last year on each, and broke it down by month/pay cycle. I noticed some categories were INSANE, so we either cut those out, or cut them down significantly. If there wasn’t money in the budget for something we wanted to do, we either waited till we did have money in the budget, or came up with something different to do.

Once we had the debt paid off, every extra dollar went in our emergency fund. It slowly built up, not quickly enough for my liking, but it was growing. Our goal was three months worth of expenses. (Dave recommends three to six months. Three was fine in our case – he recommends six months if you’re self employed and in some other situations).

In the middle of this, Covid happened, and although Darrin still had work as a public transport driver, his work became uncertain. A new company was taking over the bus depot where he worked, and he’d heard unflattering things about them. So he wasn’t optimistic about being able to stay in the conditions that he’d heard about. But we were preparing for just this kind of situation.

In September 2020, he gave his notice and left. He got his payout from work with all his unused annual leave and long service leave, which more than finished our emergency fund. But we had to live off of that money till he got a new job, so it went down again.

In January 2021, we applied for (and had approved) payments from Centrelink while he job hunted. So I based our budget off of JUST what was coming in, and tried to leave the emergency fund alone unless something came up that we needed. It would still go down slowly, but much less than before.

July 2021, our tax came in, and it was TWICE what we’d been expecting (due to Darrin’s huge payout from his last job taking more tax than was actually relevant based on his end of year income). We spent some of the money on stuff we’d been waiting for, but the rest went to the emergency fund. And finished it a second time!

We just had to have our drains cleared, which used emergency funds, and now Darrin’s off work due to Covid, so it may go down again. BUT it’s there. It’s for us to use in exactly these circumstances. We’re ok. A few years ago, this would have ruined us. I shudder to think where we’d be if we’d actually moved house two years ago, and then all this happened. If we’d never changed our habits. It certainly wouldn’t be pretty.

If you’re in debt and struggling to get ahead, don’t panic. Just go find yourself a copy of The Total Money Makeover. Library, op shop, borrow from a friend, or even buy new if you can’t find it cheap. It’s totally worth it.

Edited to add: Sometimes I feel like our story isn’t that dramatic, because we only had a few thousand dollars of debt. No credit cards, no student loans, no car payments (we’d paid that off just before we started the Ramsey plan). But the big difference is the mindset. We won’t borrow money again. We’ll save up for big purchases. Debt is not an option anymore. And the peace I have just knowing that I won’t have bill collectors coming after me, late payment notices, debt that never seems to go away, that’s something you can’t put a price tag on. We still have a house payment (which is the only debt Dave doesn’t yell at you for), and whenever we have extra money to throw at that, we will.

Can you do this if you have more debt? Yep, it just might take you longer. But once you get going, and you see the progress, you’ll start wanting to push yourself harder to get it gone quicker. I’ve heard the same story from many other people who have done this.